Postpartum depression is so common that it’s considered normal.

During my own experience with postpartum depression and throughout pregnancy, I noticed a recurring feeling of being misunderstood. Prior to becoming pregnant, I learned that feeling misunderstood presents an opportunity for accountability of some kind.

My theory is that by educating more women on three fundamental skills—

speaking ✔️

listening ✔️

accountability ✔️

—we can equip them with the tools to navigate hormonal fluctuations. This, in turn, could potentially reduce the frequency or duration of postpartum experiences. Postpartum depression isn’t inevitable; it’s something we are experiencing but not something we have to endure.

Women should prepare mentally as rigorously as they prepare physically for pregnancy. The prenatal and postpartum periods are equally crucial and, at times, daunting. If you’re currently navigating postpartum, I recommend Julian Treasure’s “H.A.I.L” process:

H - Honesty: Be clear and direct. A - Authenticity: Be true to yourself. I - Integrity: Keep your word. L - Love: Wish them well.

This process emphasizes mindful communication, where silence—particularly when your partner is speaking—can amplify conscious listening. Understanding that women often communicate expansively, while men tend to be more goal-oriented, can ease communication challenges. Recognizing this difference can foster greater empathy and understanding.

Set intentions before speaking with your partner; treat every conversation as sacred, akin to a ceremony. Communicate whether you seek advice or simply need to be heard. Take time for introspection before engaging with them.

I believe we possess all the necessary tools for emotional resilience after childbirth.

With love,

Sunumi